Recently somebody said that I liked being the "Outsider" of one of my poems. It was, she further said, my "persona". I suggested this woman see a Mad strip showing a beautiful woman complaining she never had time for herself, and her not that great friend saying something akin to "shut up!". This friend, who slots people in according to what they can do for her, is a not bad looking JAP who never had to struggle for boyfriends. She probably never had somebody break up a relationship by calling in the middle of Thanksgiving dinner (!) to say that she was looking for somebody who "made more money." Of course, in the recent financial downtrend, this same woman is probably standing on the corner going "hey sailor!". Then there was the woman who broke up with me three days before Valentine's Day whom I spotted holding hands with somebody in a fancy club. Yeah girls, love that loot!
Now that my first volume of poetry in thirty years has come out I've regained some of my lost mojo. Just today I was chatting up a gorgeous Russian blonde I've known for a few years. When I mentioned my book was poetry she seemed to grow all misty eyed. I gave her a copy, which she said she'd read on the way home. Hoping that might be a way to her heart I asked for a date via poem. Hopefully this beautiful Brighton Beach resident (where else would a babushka babe live?) will join me for coffee or dinner. This being me (right Steve, put yourself down) she's probably already involved with somebody. I'll keep my fingers, toes and eyes crossed. Let you know what happens in a future column.